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Press Kit · April 2026

A satirical match-3 browser game about Germany's whale-rescue media frenzy.

The story behind the game: In April 2026, a humpback whale (nicknamed "Timmy" by tabloids) became stranded near Poel Island in the German Baltic Sea. The country's largest tabloid BILD reported around the clock; politicians appeared on every channel; donation campaigns multiplied overnight. Meanwhile, roughly 300,000 whales and dolphins die in fishing gear globally each year — without names, without coverage. RETTE TIMMY! is a satirical response.

PitchWhat's it about?

Humpback whale Timmy strands off Poel Island — half of Germany cries, the tabloids report 24/7, the minister smells his moment. You're supposed to handle it now.

Across four levels, you manage three parallel bars next to the actual whale rescue: Timmy's life, the media hype, and the donation total. From level 3 on, a fourth bar appears — the scandal meter that can collapse everything at any moment. Between levels, you face two press conferences with questions inspired by real political non-answers, scored on a three-tier hypocrisy scale.

The run ends with one of seven different endings — from "Federal Cross of Manufactured Outrage" to the hidden "Clean Hands of the Year" — based on who you turned out to be in the staging. Plus an Outrage Score that satirically rewards high hypocrisy.

FactsQuick Facts

4Levels
7Endings
2Press Conferences
16Question Pool
~10 minper run
0Cookies

Browser-only · no app, no login · runs on iOS Safari, Android Chrome, desktop browsers · tracking only anonymous via Plausible (GDPR-compliant, cookieless). Game is in German.

ImagesScreenshots

Splash screen with hero illustration and START button
Splash · "Play the scandal."
How-to-play modal explaining four symbols and their effects
How to play · symbols and goal
Match-3 board level 1.1 with HUD: Timmy, hype, donations
Level 1.1 · match-3 with three bars
Pre-level card with fake headline ticker between levels
Level transition · fake headline ticker
Level 1.3 with additional red scandal bar and politician symbols on board
Level 1.3 · charity gala with scandal bar
Press conference with sweating minister sprite, three answer options
Press conference · three tiers of hypocrisy
Endgame with whale illustration, silver medal, outrage score 743, new record badge
Endgame · medal and Outrage Score

High-resolution versions available on request. Free to use in editorial coverage.

QuotesHighlight lines from the game (translated)

Tragic endings statistically have higher reach.
Bockhaus · Press conference 2 · Tier-3 answer
If animal welfare happens without cameras — does it even protect anything?
Bockhaus · Press conference 2 · Tier-3 answer
We saved Timmy. And our numbers along with him.
Saved-Mega ending · "Federal Cross of Outrage"
300,000 whales and dolphins die every year — no names, no story.
Donate interstitial · bridge to real charity
His death is tragic. And exceptionally well utilized.
Died-Mega ending · "Crown of Hypocrisy"
Funny how 300,000 quickly becomes a single one.
Donate interstitial · closing line

AboutAbout the project

RETTE TIMMY! emerged in response to the German media coverage of a humpback whale stranded off Poel Island in April 2026. The game is satire — all characters are clearly drawn as caricatures, all quotes are altered or invented.

Mentioned media brands (BILD, Süddeutsche, TAZ, SPIEGEL, ZDF, ARD, NTV, DPA et al.) are used exclusively in a satirical context and have no affiliation with the actual organizations or their reporting. All in-game "press quotes" and "headlines" are entirely fictional. The minister character "Bockhaus" is a fictional caricature, not an attributed statement of any real person.

The code is a single HTML file, runs entirely in-browser, has no login, and collects no personal data. The donate flow links to us.whales.org (WDC, Whale and Dolphin Conservation) — the real organization behind whale and dolphin protection, which in the game is not the punchline but the anchor against which the satire dissipates.

Play it yourself?

~10 minutes per run. Mobile or desktop. Sound recommended. Game is in German.

Launch RETTE TIMMY! →

ContactPress contact

Jessica Höppner

Mail: Jessica@jhpsolutions.de

For interviews, hi-res screenshots, code insights or further background — happy to hear from you.

SnippetsPre-written for sharing

Click "Copy" to the right of any block.

X / TwitterMastodon · ~280 characters
RETTE TIMMY — a satirical match-3 browser game about Germany's whale-rescue media frenzy. Manage hype, donations and scandal in parallel to the actual rescue. 7 endings from "Federal Cross of Outrage" to "Clean Hands of the Year". (Game in German.) https://rette-timmy.de
WhatsAppDirect message
Have you played this yet? RETTE TIMMY is a satirical browser game about the German whale media circus. You don't just manage the rescue — you manage hype, donations and scandal, and answer press-conference questions across three tiers of hypocrisy. 7 endings, ~10 min per run, runs in any browser. (Game in German.) https://rette-timmy.de
EmailSubject + body · for pitches / recommendations
Subject: RETTE TIMMY! — satirical browser game on Germany's whale media frenzy Hi, might be worth a quick mention: RETTE TIMMY (rette-timmy.de) is a satirical match-3 browser game responding to the German tabloid coverage of a humpback whale stranded off Poel Island in April 2026. Across four levels and two press conferences, you manage hype, donations and scandal risk in parallel to the rescue itself. 7 endings, ~10 min run-time, runs entirely in-browser. The game itself is in German; full press kit available in English. Press kit (EN): https://rette-timmy.de/press/ Play directly: https://rette-timmy.de Contact: Jessica@jhpsolutions.de Best regards